Tag Archives: gift

The Climb


mountain_top1

I wanted to see the world,
From a place, where it couldn’t see me.
I wanted to show the world,
A face, that it would long to be.

I walked on.
The slope was with me,
The hope was with me.
The road ahead, I could clearly see.

Slopes followed my stride,
Sun became my guide.

Air in my hair,
Wind in my wings.
I walked and strode,
Waves of luck I rode.

There stopped the thrill.
I found,
I had climbed down the hill!

The world could see me,
But didn’t want to,
I wanted to run away,
But didn’t know where to.

●~●~●~●~●~●~●~●~●~●~●

I started again-
Dejection. Despair. Pain.

The sun burnt my face,
Winds pushed me back,
The slopes tortured me,
I could hardly walk.

climbing-on-top-of-mountain

I fought on,
Pebbles holed my feet.
Luck eluded me,
But I couldn’t accept defeat.

I wriggled. I crawled,
And stopped-
for breath.

It was breath-taking!
The View!!
The view from the Top!!!

I could see the world,
The world couldn’t see me.
I was all that Now,
I ever wanted to be.

My Climb
P.S.: Sometimes poems are not the poet’s child, but a gift. And this one is one such gift.A gift from a teacher, who happened to come my way; who happened to touch my life with thoughts profound than a poem; who happened to help me climb and conquer, the mountain of fear I had built before me.
Khan Sir! I wish I could repeat after you “Insha~Allah” a million times. I stop, and murmur it in my mind, because I know those words wouldn’t sound as sweet from me, as when you utter them.
But let me just say it now, “Insha~Allah Sir, I have climbed, if not conquered yet- the mountains!!”
The child in you showed me the text on your phone that you had sent to your friend. The poet in me lent a tune to your thoughts. Yet, your thoughts seem wiser than this tune to me now!
Thank you Sir! Insha~Allah I climbed. 🙂

And “The View”!! Somebody saw it for me before I could see it on my own…Saw it with eyes more beautiful than mine, and yet chose to gift and stay anonymous 🙂
A picture is a poem plus meaning, minus words.
So should I say, A Thousand Thankyous to the Pixel Poet for this picture!!
I climbed, but you captured the view.:)
With such genuine, generous, gifted people and their good will with me, I am all that Now, I ever  wanted to be”

Advertisements

An Ode to a heavenly couple on earth!!


23rd June got to be a big day…because 25 years back in the year 1986  two strikingly different people made a strikingly same move… they strangled  each other with an alarming weapon of biological warfare…!! 😛

But if something great happened out of it…it was MY inception… 😛

The guy was crazy…could have discovered a “Satpathy’s 4th Law”….challenging the 3 that Newton had discovered ages back…!! but with due regards to Newton..he stopped ! Modesty has always been his ingrained virtue… 😛

The gal— nothing less than a pretty damsel,learnt to tackle the threads of his psyche physics and sew it into a romantic chemistry!!…

The bold Lass, learnt to master d ‘Home Science’…took d  bull by the horns…errr :P…and flipped the Head with the Tail (that follows her always)…and now she’s the HOD! (Head of my Daddy) 😛

He would fool her with all the sweet nothings in d world..

.”the Loreal and Lakmé don’t deserve to touch your lovely face my dear….

U are a marvel among God’s masterpieces…and u better not fool around with his design!!…

The gold..the silver and the diamonds appear like trinkets in your sapphire gaze…please don’t embarrass  them with your ruby red face..!!…

The silk, the brocade shy away from the sheen of your golden skin…why force them on dear??!!”  🙂  😀

And Lo!

She would gently abide..pretending to have believed every bit, making peace with the fact that she loved being fooled!!…and what a fool he was to have thought that God created Beauty…and beauty alone.. with no brains….!!

She would toss her part too…

She would know he forgets everything..

the taste…the smell…the day..the night…

But Nope! he would never ever have her out of sight…

Now it was her turn to fool him with all her might!! 😛

Some grass she would cook…

and give one damn enticing look…!! 😛

he would then relish it like the ambrosia from heaven…

reveling in her gaze from 7 till 7… 🙂 😛

Fooling each other and being delighted fools…

They would formulate their own LoVe RuLeS !!…

Yeah,,If Ignorance is bliss …

then it has to be THIS!!

hmmmm..a nice long song….:P 😛

and interestingly enough apart from sharing their lives..their souls…their breath with each other..they would also share the same Bday cake…!!

The whacky guy born on 26th of Jan and his ‘jaan’ on the 27th..they would merrily munch the same cake on the midnight of 26th…when the world slumped in slumber…and the 26th stealthily transformed into a 27th..as HE transformed into a SHE and a she into THEY…..:)

…..And Then someday… the guy and d gal got to have to have 2 kids…The kids were great…atleast not as crazy as them! 😛

But that would not suffice…They had a hobby of borrowing kids..be it the neighbour’s or the family’s…and just any size would do!!…

(NOTE: All characters in the pic below are real and true to the best of my knowledge..but the turnkey is… each one is borrowed and none is the biological offspring of the two !! :P)

….well then 25 silver years passed by…the fights would melt into laughter…the tears would transform into long serene beaches of tacit understandings…the sweat they put into the relation would sublime into estates of eternal bliss…..

and the story would go on….

their would be no ‘your family’..’my family’…

there would be no ‘you better understand that’…..

but there would be only ‘us’…’ours’ and ….

“we can brave all storms together… no matter what..”…

and the story would go on… and on..

the  sonnet would be unsung…

but they will never forget the tune….

Februaries will come and go….

but they would always celebrate the June…

This June, the Big day came and silently went by…There were no celebrations, no gifts , no parties…there were no kids..neither their own ..nor d borrowed ones…. 😛

Just that worrying about all the things in and around them ..they had no time to worry about something about them…

But they knew …very well knew..that love does not need any reason to celebrate…love does not need a date to glorify its existence…love does not need any pompous poem to weave a ballad…..

Love just knows… that it grows…and that it goes on…

” life is a celebration of togetherness…”

He knows that she knows…

and she knows that..even if she doesn’t know…she still knows…

….because he believes that she knows…..

…that there would come many such 25 years of togetherness…no greed of gold…no quest for platinum…nor appetite for any diamond…

JUST this silver….humble..modest and sublime….

Just this silver…humming the love ‘ lovely story’…of an ordinary two…

…….I remember…I and my sister, asking Mom..“.whom do you love most…? Dad or ME?…”  she would gently chuckle and say..” YOUR Dad”…because he gave me you,…. 🙂

….their  sonnet would be unsung…

but they will never forget the tune….

the Februaries will come and go….

but they would always celebrate the June… 🙂

 

 

From God-fearing to God-loving.


“Om shun…Shanaischaraya Namaha”…is all that my lips chant since yesterday… Yesterday was a really auspicious day, the religious calendars said…with all those moon, sun, planet and star positioning….some great day that had come after a span of 170 years….isn’t it amazing??

I was amazed too…this day was called the Shani Divas….the day of the Saturn god….known to bring in hard times for people like you and I….

S o many poojas would have to be done…so many chants…so many rituals…lest we invoke Shani Maharaj’s annoyance and all that we would then have would be misfortune…

So then pooja’s had to be done any way…even the not so pious man would fear being an atheist this day….So everybody joined the bandwagon of devotees to please Shani Mahaprabhu and earn their share of the fortune cookie….

Thank God that it was my friend’s papa who had taken us to Mehrauli…the Largest Shani temple in Delhi…Had it been my papa I would never have been able to make it to the pooja mandap… 😛

From 7:45 to 10:45….we were in the queue…with thousand others….a small booklet of Shani mantras….a parched throat and a scorching sun above was all that we had…Me and my friend were taking turns reading that tiny book for a while thinking the queue would dissolve as we did so….but then we had to turn back and take solace at the increasing numbers behind us rather than the numbers before in the queue…

From dusty streets to green carpet strips….we never could know where the actual temple was for nearly 2 hours…as the media people from India TV and P7 thronged the place for an interesting capture….

The wait led to a relieve period as we saw the temple gate and the mist from the unusual water spraying fans touched our red hot faces….Maroon never seemed soo good before until we were shifted to a maroon carpet patch and came to realize this was the last part of the queue… 😀

Unitl then I had lost the last iota of energy…ceased looking back or front…had shut my lips indefinitely….and just kept the chant going within my head, knowing that I may swoon any time soon. 😛  My friend’s father with hair all gray and forbearance at an epoch was my inspiration to keep me going in the infinite wait….

I was surprised to see new entrants fighting their way into the mid of the queue with so much of an audacious shamelessness, in lying to the volunteers that they were there since the morning…. O great!! they really understood the essence of praying to God and visiting temples….chicanery and deception had seeped into our bloods so much…..that made us lie on days that we considered so auspicious….

As the queue ended and so did the wait eventually…we caught a glimpse of Shani Maharaj’s Gigantic idol….I could never explain the turbulence within me…the sight made us all forget that our heels were roasting on the heated floor…I had prepared a long list of family ailments and ”things to ask for”….soon that list started playing in my head…Rewind…Pause…Forward ….and Play…. 🙂

As we all bought Pooja Thalis…we were sure God would definitely hear us this time…. We had come so far…waited so long….and had held on to faith all our lives…. Yes…the pain was worth a reward….

People were all frantic and flustered as Shani Maharaj was known to be an angry God… They should certainly perform all those rituals….and all the more religiously lest they displease bhagwanji….The Fear Factor frenzying the Diya hall…where the crowd kept on crashing into each other and each of us….at the peak of our panics….as our Diyas didn’t light…”O my God what a omen it was!!….Will it bring misfortune for sure…or was there any ritual that would compensate???!!!!” 😦

They said we were supposed to light the Diyas with our own matchstick and should not share the flame with another’s diya…as it would dump his sack of sins onto ours….O God!! Never  would I take anybody’s sins!! Was my share of sins less bothersome that I would crave for more…!!???!! 😛

…there was a separate queue for offering oil to bhagawanji….we entered that too…bought our offerings and set off…But Lo!! They would only allow Men folk to do so…and only when they took their baths and changed into a miniscule piece of red langot!!!…. 🙂

So all we could do was hand over our bottles to a someone in the queue and take leave…

….Gulping down the last sip of the lassi there and looking at the new people in the queue…we were delighted beyond measure….that we had finally done it!!

Dozing off in the car….I came back to my senses in the underground parking of Bangla Sahib…I wished for a bed but was bumped into the lift…. 😦

And as we entered the gurudwara compound…the moments were overpowering… fraught with flash backs of my entire life…

People say…” Hands that help are holier than lips that pray…But then I came to know this after coming here…after coming to you ….. to fold my hands in prayer…to open my lips for taking your name…. Your prayers have made me realize…I need to understand first and to be understood second….”

As I came to see those hands that not only joined in prayer but also helped the needy… those lips that not only chanted your name but also uttered words of compassion… I felt strangely relieved….I didn’t have to choose which was holier….which was better 🙂

As we kept our shoes in the shoe racks…I wished there would be any ritual to keep me consumed…to keep me away from this “difficult to handle” feeling…but I hardly could find any…I found myself gaping at the all sophisticated people who might have been dropped by a Mercedes and were polishing shoes here….cleaning the floor with a radiant smile emanating from their faces….

The water from the tubes at the feet of the stairs wet my feet…I felt it wet my heart too…cleaned my feet and cleansed my soul…. as I bowed down to kiss the stairs…I saw little girls of my age were offering the Amrit Jal…never had the water tasted soo different…We took the halwa Prasad into the gurudwara…and having done the parikrama….sat down to pray…

Then it just would not stop…dripping incessantly… as if determined to flush away all that I had…and never again moisten my cheeks….I suddenly had a running nose too…and I found myself floundering which one to wipe…the eyes or the nose??!!

Thank God that we drape our Dupattas over  our heads here…that hid some of the water flow…and Thank God…that she never questions too much….perhaps she was going through the same as was I…

They were chanting the Amrit Vaani…and I was startled to find my soul responding to a language that I couldn’t even remotely understand….The words Prem and Satya…..being repeated over and over …..and tears running down over and over…

I couldn’t take it any more and so decided to move out…as we got into the waiting hall for having the langar….I was still trying to figure out why couldn’t I ask Bhagwaanji for a single thing from my wish list….except a “samastanka bhala hou….May everybody have your good will….” How dumb I was to forget wishing??!!…the shani chant still hanging around my head….made me feel dizzier than ever before…..

The wait ended soon and we were made to sit in a commodious hall with an assortment of people from all layers of our social strata…

It was more than describable more than divine as a feeble old man kept reciting… “ wahe guru da khalsa …wahe guru di fateh….and something followed by a satnaam….” I switched off everything within me…even the chants…. and my lips repeated his words….

We finished the lunch and set out….

Everybody was smiling at each other…as if they had known each other since ages…. everybody seemed so fearless….the intrepid aura clearly warming each soul…there was no ritual that could go wrong…there was no folly that could enrage Bhagwaanji….there was no nothing that could stir up the serenity….all that pervaded was Peace….

As we were buying a few kadaas…the echoes of the amrit vaani was playing both loud and gentle….something which meant…”You have come here to me….with all your fears….but just don’t forget my child….you need not fear when I am here…. Just don’t worry….Surrender yourself….surrender….because I am there….and I will take care….”

Thanks…..I do believe you will take care….all my life I have asked you for so many things..never realizing you already knew what I desire….what I deserve….and that you will take care….

I had feared all my life whether my prayers would be answered?? Whether the diya that I couldn’t light at the first stroke would bring me misfortune??  Whether consciously  or unconsciously I commit a folly…and what if the folly isn’t a folly, but a sin??…..Never realizing,  I was merely a medium….whatever happened and whatever would happen was all a part of your design….

Today I go back….and having taken so much from you…I return back all that I had been collecting since consciousness prevailed….Yes….I  give you all my fears….just one…that, “Do I deserve all that I desire??” for the first time in life I pray to deserve rather than desire….Well …I know..You would take care of everything….and you would make me capable of deserving whatever I desire in life…and beyond…..

I had come here God-fearing….and I go back loving you….loving myself…loving whatever you have surrounded me with….

I go back fearless….I go back God-loving……

Because I know…You would take care……